大家好啊! 又是我啦!! 哈哈...好白痴的开场白...说真的,有时侯还蛮讨厌写部落格的,因为我总是想不到新鲜或者是比较吸引人的开场白.哈哈...
终于要踏进4月份了,很开心,也很期待. 我觉得现在是我人生中最关键的时刻,也有一股冲动很想快点达到我的要求与完成我的计划. 再过几天, 我就真的要把我脑里草率的计划很有规律与规模的写出来,做成一份报告.哈哈!!! 好夸张,其实不会做成报告啦,不过会很仔细的写出来,因为现在我脑里面的计划实在是太草率了,我担心到最后会完成不了.
与其说担心,倒不如说害怕吧.我真的很害怕面对现实,我害怕我现在所想的,所期待的,不会发生.我更害怕前方会有什么事情令我的未来变得更糟糕.所以,与其到时候才找方法来解决,不如我现在就做好防范措施,让自己的内在与外在不断的进步与提升,到时候如果真的遇到什么问题,我看我都可以利用我的智慧去解决吧..
也许你们会觉得我很忌人忧天吧,可是,我却觉得我现在所准备和担心的,都只是为了我未来的保障.现在,一步一步地进行和实现着我的计划.希望一切会很顺利吧.... 你们大家也要加油哦!!! 有计划和愿望的朋友们,就让我们一起去实现吧!! 加油!!!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
一个人
终于有时间上线了...最近都很忙,我的好友们几乎都在投诉我没时间理她们吧.哈哈...别担心,很快地我就要辞去我现在的工作,专心地读书了...想到着,我都兴奋起来.哈哈
突然很想写出自己的心情和想法,却又不知从何写起. Hmm.... 就从读书的事情说起好了. 我已经选了我自己想读的科目也选了学校....就这样而已....可是不知道为什么,还是有一种莫名其妙的感觉一直压抑着. 我说大家, 不知从什么时候开始,我不再对你们诉说自己的想法和感受了呢? 虽然知道你们都很担心我, 可我却觉得我不再是以前那个无话不说的我了,而我自己所告诉你们的,全部都不是事实的全部,全部都有所保留, 总是觉得自己在撑着.
好讨厌这样的我啊,真的很痛恨这样的自己. 该怎么说呢? 我真的不想自己一个人面对和解决所有的问题啊, 这种坚韧,理智的个性, 让我开始觉得好累. 有时候真的很想让自己幼稚,放松一下,可我却怎么也过不了我自己. 爸,妈,从小到大你们都觉得我很独立,不用依赖你们.你们都觉得所有的事情我总是会为我自己安排好,甚至会觉得我已经计划好所有的事,而且这将会是对的选择,即使失败了,我也已经为我自己安排好失败后的事情.所以从来都不需要你们来为我操心. 我说....爸,妈...我好累啊, 我真的很想像哥哥那样的依赖你们, 大学的事,从头到尾都是我一个人包办,我现在甚至需要考虑和计划15年以后的事啊.真想告诉你们,我才18岁,我还需要你们啊,偶尔让我依赖你们一下,可以吗?
哈,没想到写到这里,我还竟然为自己流泪, 真的搞不懂这些泪是在可怜自己,还是安慰着自己必需体谅父母亲的苦心. 我说大家,真羡慕你们啊,有父母亲的陪同,有父母亲的协助,一起去面对你们的未来. 你们一定要好好地珍惜啊...
曾经有人对我说过这样的一句话...."美丽的并非这个世界,其实真正美丽的是你坦然面对和有勇气接受这个世界丑恶的一面,每个人的个性是上天的恩赐,所以要好好地利用与珍惜." 当时我还小,不懂他在说什么,现在终于明白了. 在我明白的同时,我也有推翻着个说法的理由, 其实, 我并没有坦然面对世界的丑恶,也没有勇气接受,当时的我只是被美丽的假面蒙蔽了,所以世界是美丽的,当然,现在的我却看清要在这个世界生存,就必须懂得除了黑与白,还有灰色的那面.只要掌握灰色地带,我就有资格生存.我也只不过是被迫去面对而已.
还是会被自己的坚韧和理智的个性而连累. 是连累么? 我不懂......那种压迫感和压抑感,又有谁明白当中的矛盾呢? 还是得一个人去面对......
突然很想写出自己的心情和想法,却又不知从何写起. Hmm.... 就从读书的事情说起好了. 我已经选了我自己想读的科目也选了学校....就这样而已....可是不知道为什么,还是有一种莫名其妙的感觉一直压抑着. 我说大家, 不知从什么时候开始,我不再对你们诉说自己的想法和感受了呢? 虽然知道你们都很担心我, 可我却觉得我不再是以前那个无话不说的我了,而我自己所告诉你们的,全部都不是事实的全部,全部都有所保留, 总是觉得自己在撑着.
好讨厌这样的我啊,真的很痛恨这样的自己. 该怎么说呢? 我真的不想自己一个人面对和解决所有的问题啊, 这种坚韧,理智的个性, 让我开始觉得好累. 有时候真的很想让自己幼稚,放松一下,可我却怎么也过不了我自己. 爸,妈,从小到大你们都觉得我很独立,不用依赖你们.你们都觉得所有的事情我总是会为我自己安排好,甚至会觉得我已经计划好所有的事,而且这将会是对的选择,即使失败了,我也已经为我自己安排好失败后的事情.所以从来都不需要你们来为我操心. 我说....爸,妈...我好累啊, 我真的很想像哥哥那样的依赖你们, 大学的事,从头到尾都是我一个人包办,我现在甚至需要考虑和计划15年以后的事啊.真想告诉你们,我才18岁,我还需要你们啊,偶尔让我依赖你们一下,可以吗?
哈,没想到写到这里,我还竟然为自己流泪, 真的搞不懂这些泪是在可怜自己,还是安慰着自己必需体谅父母亲的苦心. 我说大家,真羡慕你们啊,有父母亲的陪同,有父母亲的协助,一起去面对你们的未来. 你们一定要好好地珍惜啊...
曾经有人对我说过这样的一句话...."美丽的并非这个世界,其实真正美丽的是你坦然面对和有勇气接受这个世界丑恶的一面,每个人的个性是上天的恩赐,所以要好好地利用与珍惜." 当时我还小,不懂他在说什么,现在终于明白了. 在我明白的同时,我也有推翻着个说法的理由, 其实, 我并没有坦然面对世界的丑恶,也没有勇气接受,当时的我只是被美丽的假面蒙蔽了,所以世界是美丽的,当然,现在的我却看清要在这个世界生存,就必须懂得除了黑与白,还有灰色的那面.只要掌握灰色地带,我就有资格生存.我也只不过是被迫去面对而已.
还是会被自己的坚韧和理智的个性而连累. 是连累么? 我不懂......那种压迫感和压抑感,又有谁明白当中的矛盾呢? 还是得一个人去面对......
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Reborn
Hey everyone. It's me. I think it's quite a long time I dint update my blog. haha NO worry guys! I'm fine. I really fine. Haha....
Quite strange for me to blog now. I mean....I've got no idea what to write about because a lot of things happened and changed during this time, and the...... I still fine, ha, god bless. I don't even know how to start my story, and, I... don't know where to start some more. But anyway, what was past had past. We should look further.
Quite strange for me to blog now. I mean....I've got no idea what to write about because a lot of things happened and changed during this time, and the...... I still fine, ha, god bless. I don't even know how to start my story, and, I... don't know where to start some more. But anyway, what was past had past. We should look further.
Okay. Time to go. I will try my best to post more about my life, in details.... and hope to meet you guys soon.
I won't betray my promise....Never....
I won't betray my promise....Never....
Thursday, December 31, 2009
A great start for 2010
Haha! One word to describe my feeling now, IT'S "FUN"!!! I just back from count down, and it's crazy at "The Curve".
Sprayers here and there,
Have fun with that, but I can't even breath, all the spray stucking inside my nostril.Yiek!!
My body feeling very itchy,sticky and smelly just now but still, had tea after count down wif my primary school friends.Hey! do you get my point? PRIMARY SCHOOL FRIENDS!!
We meet again just now! and they're quite funny and interesting, no more kid-alike! All of them growth so much.OMG I just feeling like I'm a mama has look after them since they was still a kid until now. Eww snif snif, finally they all growth and become a handsome guy. Snif snif, I am so impress HAHAHAHA, lol.
well, That's all tonight seriously, even thousand words also can't explain how I really feel now.
so, good night and happy new year everyone!! =D
Friday, December 25, 2009
What I'd done for this christmas eve
Merry christmas everyone. haha I plan to stay at home for this christmas eve. Why? because everyone thought that I am full booked but actually NOT! haha well, it's okay. I eat a lot and drink a lot today. LOL sound like a pig, but I admit that I'm a pig. haha Went to my friend's christmas party this afternoon, ate home made turkey,salad, shopping and more. Okay, that's not the main stuffs I find interesting actually. haha
I feel so boring when I reached home and I "accidently" look at my piano when I take off my heels. I had stop practice piano long time ago and today, is the day, my music cells "reborn". I found a lot of interesting songs that I had abandon long time ago,such as, "Phantom of the opera, ShangHai beach, Mariage D'Amour and a movie series- Love is not all around".My first aim is to learn Love is not all around, it's a kind of touching and romantic song.
Melody is all around you if you
diligently perceive it.
Melody is all around you if you
diligently perceive it.
Merry X'mas
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Boy Vs Man
I personally feel that Man is more attractive than boy. You know, I would rather tell you guys my boyfriend is a man than my boyfriend is a......boy. From my knowledge, "Boy" is category at 30 and above and "man" is category as below 30.
From my opinion, man understand you clearly. They know how to respect the opposite sex and of course they provide what you need as well. Man know how to give an appropriate respond in a particular moment as to gain the good impression from you, at the same time, they helped you, too, when you're in trouble. They can fulfill what you need and provide what you suppose to "need".I'm not talking about the financial but the internal and external feelings. They know how to give confidence to the opposite sex and they make you feel "you're the BEST".They will talk polite and formal and girls or women will probably think that we're all in heaven. Like a normal incense, " you're so gorgeous tonight" will definitely melts the girls or women. They won't tell you,"you're so pretty or beautiful tonight" but they will just use the "gorgeous" word. Normally boys use pretty or beautiful to praise you but they don't know, girls or women prefer the word gorgeous than the million or billion times of pretty and beautiful from you.
Why do girl like "me" prefer man than a boy? Okay, from my own opinion, I found that most of my girl friends which are in couple, they facing a problem, a problem that seriously might cause their relationship split up, they feel their partner not tender and never show their consideration to them. Boy is just so careless and they'll never understand your decision and never respect your decision or whatever. This situation can be understand but not acceptable, because when they're confuse about your decision how can they still support you?Why unacceptable? Because they don't even try their best to understand you and as a boyfriend, is it you should respect your partner decision no matter what? just like girls always respect you and willing to sacrifice our sleeping time to accompany you for jogging or do whatever activities.Why don't you guys just sacrifice your a little bit time to understand and respect us? Contrary, man knows girls or women very well, they give support quietly or straight helping us in their action and at the end of the story, of course the girls or women will fall for the man even though she had no feeling to that man before. Do you know what I mean? This is the advantages we should rather choose a man instead of a boy.
Do not say "I don't know" in front of girls or women because you'll definitely show us your disadvantages. Girl like me, I do feel annoying when I am asking you a question seriously and hoping you would give me an actual and helpful answer but at the end you just tell me "I don't know". Why don't you guys just say " Let me think"? This is more appropriate when I am grim and need some help from you.Actually "let me think" is just the phrase to use to pacify and cover your helpless before you say out the 3 stupid words "I don't know".Even though I know that clearly, I mean, I know that you are actually helpless but I just need pacify, at least I can feel that you'd already tried your best to help me and not perfunctory me with 'I DON'T KNOW!
That is what I always emphasize, someone who're glamorous not because that he's good looking than you or he's kindness melt all the girls. He's glamorous because he know how to pacify and lend us a hand when we feeling helpless,even though at the end he help nothing at all but at least he let us know that no matter what, he still will lend us a hand even though he's helpless this time. This is where he gain his first and good impression from girls. They know how to control the conversation and give appropriate respond just in time. Man knows all these kinda stuff very well. That's why I prefer man than boy. And also, that's why I am still single now. Hahaha~!
From my opinion, man understand you clearly. They know how to respect the opposite sex and of course they provide what you need as well. Man know how to give an appropriate respond in a particular moment as to gain the good impression from you, at the same time, they helped you, too, when you're in trouble. They can fulfill what you need and provide what you suppose to "need".I'm not talking about the financial but the internal and external feelings. They know how to give confidence to the opposite sex and they make you feel "you're the BEST".They will talk polite and formal and girls or women will probably think that we're all in heaven. Like a normal incense, " you're so gorgeous tonight" will definitely melts the girls or women. They won't tell you,"you're so pretty or beautiful tonight" but they will just use the "gorgeous" word. Normally boys use pretty or beautiful to praise you but they don't know, girls or women prefer the word gorgeous than the million or billion times of pretty and beautiful from you.
Why do girl like "me" prefer man than a boy? Okay, from my own opinion, I found that most of my girl friends which are in couple, they facing a problem, a problem that seriously might cause their relationship split up, they feel their partner not tender and never show their consideration to them. Boy is just so careless and they'll never understand your decision and never respect your decision or whatever. This situation can be understand but not acceptable, because when they're confuse about your decision how can they still support you?Why unacceptable? Because they don't even try their best to understand you and as a boyfriend, is it you should respect your partner decision no matter what? just like girls always respect you and willing to sacrifice our sleeping time to accompany you for jogging or do whatever activities.Why don't you guys just sacrifice your a little bit time to understand and respect us? Contrary, man knows girls or women very well, they give support quietly or straight helping us in their action and at the end of the story, of course the girls or women will fall for the man even though she had no feeling to that man before. Do you know what I mean? This is the advantages we should rather choose a man instead of a boy.
Do not say "I don't know" in front of girls or women because you'll definitely show us your disadvantages. Girl like me, I do feel annoying when I am asking you a question seriously and hoping you would give me an actual and helpful answer but at the end you just tell me "I don't know". Why don't you guys just say " Let me think"? This is more appropriate when I am grim and need some help from you.Actually "let me think" is just the phrase to use to pacify and cover your helpless before you say out the 3 stupid words "I don't know".Even though I know that clearly, I mean, I know that you are actually helpless but I just need pacify, at least I can feel that you'd already tried your best to help me and not perfunctory me with 'I DON'T KNOW!
That is what I always emphasize, someone who're glamorous not because that he's good looking than you or he's kindness melt all the girls. He's glamorous because he know how to pacify and lend us a hand when we feeling helpless,even though at the end he help nothing at all but at least he let us know that no matter what, he still will lend us a hand even though he's helpless this time. This is where he gain his first and good impression from girls. They know how to control the conversation and give appropriate respond just in time. Man knows all these kinda stuff very well. That's why I prefer man than boy. And also, that's why I am still single now. Hahaha~!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
It finally over~!!
Hey hey~! I'm back. Guess what? Spm is over!!! I had done all the 9 disgusting papers with "lack of confidence" hahaha.Ya, I admit that I din't prepare well and din't study much for my spm, I din't pay attention and never put effort on it, but so what? It's end, IT'S OVER! hahaha. I know my dead time will be on march 2010 and the......it's something for me to suffer after 3 months.BUT, 3 months, IT'S 3 MONTHS FOR ME TO BE A TRUE ZOMBIE. hahahaha I mean, I need to fulfill my desire during this 3 months. Here's my list.
1) Dye my hair, I don't want black colour anymore.
I had achieved this on yesterday (9/12/2009). Means, the next day after SPM's over.HAHA I can't wait anymore, I am hell boring for the black colour hair that stick on my head, and now, I have a new stylish light brown colour.HAHA spend RM260, quite worth eh because the package included treatment, cut,wash and dye. VERY WORTH LAH~!! hahaha
2) Go for charity
I tell you guys lah. Seriously, SPM just ended 2 days and now I am freaking boring. I feel like I am a useless human sitting in front of the television, eating snack and trance at the walls doing nothing at home. SO, I plan to go for charity, helping people is much more better rather than sitting in front of the television. I need to made a plan for it.
3) Get a job
Hmm, this is really what I suppose to do and something I refuse to do. I need revenue but I don't need work. SEE!! sigh I just too lazy you know, sometimes I will think about all the RM100 notes can just drop on my head whenever I need. Damn ridiculous.
4)Shopping
Shopping is what I alway do, but I need to do it often since holidays started and chinese new year getting nearer. New clothes + new hair style and new colour for my hair is what I alway wish to do after SPM.
5)Clubbing
All my friends have been talking about clubbing during SPM. I think I should check out too.
6)Practise piano and start my violin journey.
I stopped practise my piano since I was 13, and I planing to learn it again together with violin. I am freaking free during this holidays so I think I should learn something to improve myself and not being a lazy bug at home.The main obstacle that I face now will definitely causes my dream might not be able to comes true is "financial problem". So, I really really suppose to get a job.
1) Dye my hair, I don't want black colour anymore.
I had achieved this on yesterday (9/12/2009). Means, the next day after SPM's over.HAHA I can't wait anymore, I am hell boring for the black colour hair that stick on my head, and now, I have a new stylish light brown colour.HAHA spend RM260, quite worth eh because the package included treatment, cut,wash and dye. VERY WORTH LAH~!! hahaha
2) Go for charity
I tell you guys lah. Seriously, SPM just ended 2 days and now I am freaking boring. I feel like I am a useless human sitting in front of the television, eating snack and trance at the walls doing nothing at home. SO, I plan to go for charity, helping people is much more better rather than sitting in front of the television. I need to made a plan for it.
3) Get a job
Hmm, this is really what I suppose to do and something I refuse to do. I need revenue but I don't need work. SEE!! sigh I just too lazy you know, sometimes I will think about all the RM100 notes can just drop on my head whenever I need. Damn ridiculous.
4)Shopping
Shopping is what I alway do, but I need to do it often since holidays started and chinese new year getting nearer. New clothes + new hair style and new colour for my hair is what I alway wish to do after SPM.
5)Clubbing
All my friends have been talking about clubbing during SPM. I think I should check out too.
6)Practise piano and start my violin journey.
I stopped practise my piano since I was 13, and I planing to learn it again together with violin. I am freaking free during this holidays so I think I should learn something to improve myself and not being a lazy bug at home.The main obstacle that I face now will definitely causes my dream might not be able to comes true is "financial problem". So, I really really suppose to get a job.
Stuffs I bought last week
A greenish wallet from Bimba& Lola
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
